To Hell And Back

When was the last time i posted? I have started to appreciate what kira has done to make this blog for me. Hmm, it has been two years? Lol. :B

My left foot is hurt by the roller blades. It hurts abit.
Anyways, tomorrow is CCA day. I hope i won't lose my emotions
anymore or else..

Now i finally understand what you meant to tell me that time. Such things were not worth for something like me. And ALLOW .

He thought me so many things yet i'm still submisive(?) to such human emotions. Have i not trained hard enough? Why? Why am i always trapped within the walls of the container i dwell in? It's so wet, slippery... i keep falling. when will i learn how to jump? When will i learn to see through problems with every aspect? I've let him down, i can feel.. i can. I'm sorry.

No, my emotions are leaving me. I can't even shed i single tear now. No pain, no nothing. I feel like a robot. He taught me well, but when will i come to realise what's right and what's not? I'm so confused. Who's to blame? Myself? For letting my soul slip slowly away from myself? The others who are making me lose my mind? What? At least, what i have left of my emotions are still the hatred, the grudges and the devlish side. Enough to survive and manipulate. Is that bad? Will i ever learn? Why is this entry SO emo? Damn it, face the world. I won't run away anymore. I won't..

Time to watch naruto.

ARGH. MY LIFE IS BEGINNING TO SUCK!
WHAT THE FUCK! FUCK! ARGH!
ARGH!
What the fuck is wrong with THAT friend?!
FUCKING ASSIGNMENT.
FUCK EVERYTHING.

it's me that's lovesick..
the cause is YOU
no the cause never did turn back to me.
ignore my selfishness dear,
i'm a human after all
i can't say no to desires
can't say no to what i like LIKE.
so.. please if it's just a one worded answer,
wouldn't that be an extra bonus,
it's no use running.
i might just stalk you where ever you go.
or even have my hands stained blood.
so why not give me the SIMPLE answer?
Yes or no?
so i can be cured and live on my fucking turbulent life.
so give it up typhoon.